Weekend Road Trip: Don’t Mess With Lady Speeders!

dementia


An older lady gets pulled over for speeding…

Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?

Officer: Ma’am, you were speeding.

Older Woman: Oh, I see.

Officer: Can I see your license please?

Older Woman: I’d give it to you but I don’t have one.

Officer: Don’t have one?

Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving.

Officer: I see. Can I see your vehicle registration papers, please.

Older Woman: I can’t do that.

Officer: Why not?

Older Woman: I stole this car

Officer: Stole it?

Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.

Officer: You what?

Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see

The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half-drawn gun.

Officer 2: Ma’am, could you step out of your vehicle please! The woman steps out of her vehicle.

Older woman: Is there a problem sir?

Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.

Older Woman: Murdered the owner?

Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.

The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty space.

Officer 2: Is this your car, ma’am?

Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers.

The officer is quite stunned.

Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license.

The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer.

The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.

Officer 2: Thank you ma’am. I’m sorry, but one of my officers told me you didn’t have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.

Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too!!!!

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* Thanks to my good friend, Bill, for sharing this bit of humor. Bill was my neighbor when we lived in the Seattle area. He’s one of the truly good guys in this world.

5 replies
  1. Terry
    Terry says:

    Good one, Lee.
    We did the family thing last week, and have reservations for Thanksgiving. With just two of us, I don’t want to cook and he doesn’t want to do the dishes, so it’ll be quiet.

  2. Elena
    Elena says:

    Ahhhh – the power of older women! It’s one of the benefits of getting older that I am really enjoying.

    Thanks for my big grin!

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